My helpful quote for the day

I'm leaving everything I know in less than a week. I sure hope college is a blast.

"If you're feeling frightened about what comes next, don't be.

Embrace the uncertainty. Allow it to lead you places.

Be brave as it challenges you to exercise both your heart

and your mind as you create your own path towards happiness,

don't waste time with regret. And if you should ever look up

and find yourself lost, simply take a breath and start over.

Retrace your steps and go back to the purest place in your heart...

where your hope lives. You'll find your way again."

-Gilmore Girls

About 7 months now.

It's a very strange feeling, knowing that almost everything in your life is going to completely change in the next 7 months. I won't be with my family all the time. I'm moving away from all of my friends, my church. No more high school. (Thank you Jesus.) It's just weird to know that you're gonna have to make big decisions that will make a huge impact on the rest of your life.
I'm really excited, but really scared.

Almost Christmas!

Winter break is so nice.
I just love Christmas time.

A...Poem?

So this is a poem I wrote that follows absolutely
no pattern at all. haha. It's just random thoughts
all jumbled up into this...thing. :)

A cherished gift,
Grasped tightly with both hands,
Wishing never to let go.
Then everything turns,
The places reversed,
Rust meets sapphire.
It is all understood,
Words are not necessary,
Necessity is intertwining,
Inner-most passion,
However, intensity is not normality.

The balance is shifting,
You're forced to lose control.
Vulnerability is not easily let go.
The thoughtful release of sought out answers.
We want to know, yet afraid of our own judgments.
Fingertips touch, shocked by emotion.
Silence is no longer self-defense.

Winter Retreat 2010

I went to my church's retreat this last weekend.
I've been asked from many different people to explain what this weekend
was like for me, what happened, what I learned.
Honestly, I can't think of a better way to explain it, but through writing.
Because when I talk about it, I tend to forget major details,
please bear with me as I jump from topic to topic. :)

Friday, February 12th-Day 1

Who is God?
We usually associate who he is, through what he means to us at the moment,
or in the current situation we are in.
For example, if you are upset, you view him as your comforter (which he is).
If you are unhappy, you may view him as your joy. (which he also is.)
Or if you are heartbroken, you may view him as your healer. (again, he is.)
But we tend to associate him only with those things that we want him to be.
We forget that he is so much more than our healer, comforter and our joy.
He is every good and amazing thing we could ever think of.
Which blows my mind.

A heart needs four things. (according to Jon Tyson.)
1. A sense of Wonder.
2. A quest for Truth.
3. True Love.
4. Security.

Jesus is all of those things.
Many people look for these things in everything other than God.
I'm not saying that you cannot have wonder, truth, love and security
in people. But before you can truly find those things in people, you
have to find them in God.

He's forgiven everyone for all of the horrible things you've done.
All of the sins that you've committed.
He was there when you did them, and he's here now.

Saturday, February 13th-Day 2

The speed of Life.
We go through everyday constantly thinking about what else we have
to accomplish that day, that week, that month, that year.

People find life so hard to appreciate now because we have an
idealized future. But we have to fully engage ourselves in what's
going on NOW. Not tomorrow, not yesterday, now.

(Matthew 6 v. 25, Do not worry about tomorrow, today has enough
trouble of it's own.)

God doesn't think about our to-do list, or the mistakes we've made in the past.
He cares about us today, and everyday.
You cannot find God if you rush through your life.

To be able to live in the now, we have to be able to pray about our
problems, to be still, and spend time with God.
A lot of people know the bible, very few know themselves.

We need to:
1. Walk slowly through the world.
2. Take the time to notice where God is working, and has worked in your life.
3. Be here NOW. Be fully present.

Sunday, February 14th-Day 3

We have to be able to arrange our lives in the way where sin and temptation
no longer looks good to us. We have to be so on fire for God that we are no
longer affected by the things that Satan is tempting us with.

All temptation is, is something to try and make you doubt God.

Satan will do anything in his power to rob you of your Joy.
Because joyless Christianity, is not Christianity, because our God
is a God of complete Joy.

Christianity is about Joy and Celebration.


Alright, well that's what I learned this weekend, and I hope
you learned something as well. :)

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully rung with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket-safe, dark, motionless, airless-it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable...The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers of love is hell."
-CS Lewis.

For you I'd bleed myself dry.